Ruin The Joke!

At Christmas this year, my ten year-old nephew (the one who inspired Kris’s silliness below, and left) told us this joke, and then explained to us what made it funny– he pointed out that it’s usually funnier when you have to figure out what the punch line means, instead of having it explained to you. So we’ve been thinking about how to ruin jokes, and thought it might make for a fun 12apostrophes game.

Here’s an example:

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks, “why are you so sad?”

(See, the REAL line is, the bartender asks, “why the long face?” Get how the joke is ruined?)

Now you try one. It’s best to use jokes that most people might have heard, but, if you think it’s unfamiliar, start with the real punchline and then give us the spoiled version.

10 Responses to Ruin The Joke!

  1. Kris says:

    My grandfather could ruin a joke pretty well. One of his favorites was, “What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhinoceros? . . . Hell if I know!”

    But often enough he’d say it: “What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhinoceros? . . . Beats the shit out of me.”

    Lacks that certain “punny” quality, and becomes more of a meditation on being and nothingness. Where does the elephant end and the rhinoceros begin, we wonder?

    But there’s another way to ruin that joke. When my brother and I were remembering how Grandpap would tell the joke, my brother said, “What do you get when you cross an elephant and a hippopotamus? . . . Beats the shit out of me!”

    And it really does, the elephant-hippopotamus hybrid is a true mystery, unless you want to go with “Hell if hippo!”

  2. Unwit says:

    This joke won the Best Joke Ever contest and I have to tell it, then I’ll ruin it:

    Woman comes home from work and finds her husband in bed with a sheep. Stands in the bedroom doorway, nonplussed.

    The husband says, “Darling, that’s the pig I sleep with when you’re not here.”

    Wife: “That’s not a pig, it’s a sheep.”

    Husband: “I’m not talking to you.”

    Da-DUM-cymbal splash!

    You could ruin it by making it go like this:

    Husband: “Darling, that’s the pig I sleep with when you’re not here.”

    Wife: “That’s not a pig, that’s a rhinoceros . . . .”

  3. Kris says:

    Wife: “That’s not a pig, it’s a sheep.”

    Husband: “Sorry, I meant, that’s the SHEEP I sleep with when you’re not here. I can’t find my pig.”

  4. Duodecad says:

    I don’t know if this counts, but I heard a pretty bad joke from a co-worker today:

    Q: “What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile?”
    A: “Robin, get in the Batmobile.”

  5. Steven Koski says:

    A pony has a sore throat so he goes to the vet.
    The vet says, “You’re OK, you’re just a little hoarse.”

    The ruined version…
    The vet says, “You’re OK, you’re just a diminutive breed of Equus caballus.”

  6. Steven Koski says:

    Q: Where does a one-legged waiter work?

    A: International House of Pancakes!

    Real joke–A: IHOP

Post a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *